Break ups attract a lot of negative emotions. There’s obviously hurt and heartbreak. But at some level there’s also anger and a sense of betrayal. Being in a couple means having someone special in your life, so it’s only natural that the days following a break up are filled with loneliness.
This is why to feel “normal” again, a lot of couples eventually end up getting back together with their ex. More often than not, this hasty move drives them right into a never ending vicious cycle that is all but part and parcel of an unhealthy relationship.
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To avoid long-term unhappiness there are three key questions that should be asked before getting back together with your ex.
Are You Ready to Make the Compromise?
It is understood that relationships can’t move forward without compromises. It is hence, important to ask if you and your partner are happy making those compromises? This is especially important to consider given the fact that the break up probably happened because neither you nor your ex were ready to make those compromises not very long ago.
If you’re ready, then great! It means that the time apart has changed you both significantly and that you are ready to give it another go.
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However, there is no point going back if you will really have to compromise on something unacceptable or if you are bound to feel frustrated again in the long run.
Are the External Forces of the Relationship Any Different?
Maybe your partner has a drug addiction or maybe it is his/her job and/or an annoying joint family that resulted in the break up. In case it was the external forces that resulted in the debacle; be absolutely sure that they are not going to have an influence again.
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Going back without surety leaves very little room for success and puts you in danger of another, imminent heartbreak.
Will It be of More Benefit in the Long Run?
Finally, you need to ask yourself if going back will be of more benefit to everyone that includes you, your ex and family members (particularly, children, if there are any).
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Bear in mind that no family can live happily together if the couple itself has issues. So, only go back once you are absolutely sure that the two of you are in a better position to pull off the relationship successfully!