23 Thoughts That Crossed My Mind While Watching Indian Pilot Abhinandan Vartha Receiving The Vir Chakra Award

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abhinandan vartha Vir Chakra

So I finally watched Indian pilot Abhinandan Vartha getting the Vir Chakra Award today and these are the 23 thoughts that crossed my mind!

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1. This whole setting reminds me of some ancient Indian king’s Throne Room. With how the guards are standing next to the throne. And the king sits on a seat that has a statue behind him.

2. My inner fashion junkie can’t stop admiring the guards’ red coats. Such a lovely colour!

3. It’s good to see an entire audience wearing face masks. Even Modi sahab and his men are wearing them!

4. Oooo, the announcer pronounces every word like those video game characters who announce the names of their attacks before hitting their opponent.

5. Lesson of the day: the name Vir Chakra is not pronounced as “Veer Chaakraa.” It’s pronounced as “Vir Chukruh.”

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6. I will never understand why military officers walk with their legs flying and feet stomping when they are giving and receiving things in a ceremony. Aaraam se chalo, bhai! Your suit and cap are fancy enough to make you stand out!

7. O look! That’s our good ‘ol chaaye buddy, Abhinandan Vartha!

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8. Did I just hear the announcer telling everyone that this guy shot down a Pakistani fighter jet? Ummmm…this is a whole other level of gaslighting!

9. The way the announcer is gushig over his heroism and bravery it seems like baji jaan, bhi Abhinandan ky saath hee chaaye cup peenay ayeen theen.

10. Getting major Abhinandan-drinking-the-fantastic-tea flashbacks.

11. I just noticed(!) he’s changed the style of his moustache. It’s much shorter than the last time. Totally divided about how I feel on this front…

12. It’s a shame that face masks cover up half of the face. I would kill to see the facial expressions behind them!

13. I am amazed at the officers who are sitting there. Must be really hard to keep a straight face with all the fictional commentary commeorating a fictional account blasting across the hall.

Read: 14 Thoughts That Crossed My Mind While Watching Atif Aslam and Mahira Khan’s Ajnabi!

14. God…will the dramatic commentary ever end? Whoever wrote her script probbaly also moonlights for StarPlus.

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15. O look! There’s Modi jee! Sitting there so calmly after successfully throwing his country into an extremist nightmare.

16. I bet my life’s savings that every Pakistani who sees this ceremony will end-up laughing hoarse.

17. Jokes aside, aren’t the arches of the hall pretty? Like, they are so graceful to look at!

18. Finally! The announcer stops speaking. Let me offer shukrana!

19. Abhinandan is now marching towards the person sitting on that throne-type chair.

20. The guy giving Abhinandan that medal…he looks as if he just wants to get over with the ceremony. He took no time putting on that medal and getting it over with. If it weren’t 2021, I’d think he was in a rush to attend to his rippened starwberries in Farmville.

21. Even the salute was half-assed…he looks so done with the whole thing.

22. Now that this is almost over I dearly hope Arnab Goswani doesn’t decide to do a piece on this ceremony – because I don’t think I have a lot air left in my lungs from all the laughing!

23. Time to head to Twitter and amuse myself with all the Pakistani meme-fest following this Vir Chakra – no, Vir Chukruh, ceremony.